Stop calling me an idiot

I figured that since so many companies think I’m an idiot, it’s time to dedicate an entire category of my blog to Idiot Marketing.

From today’s mailbox…

As you can see, while the item was addressed to “Valued California Resident,” (spam spam spam!) it was marked as “official business” (possibly important) so I decided to open it.

Envelope with \"OFFICIAL BUSINESS\" printed on it.

As soon as I opened it, I knew it was junk. A fake check. “This is not a check” is a term that in idiot marketer language means “Ha! Idiot! We got you to look at our offer!”

This is not a check.

The best part about this fake check was how much trouble they went through to make it look like a real check. They implemented security features including microprinting.

Thanks a lot, unnamed big company of which I am already a customer, (they could have addressed me by name!), you just called me an idiot.

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